It's no secret that I'm a big Gears of War fan. I've really enjoyed all the games and firmly believe they offer some of the best third-person action in gaming. So, why am I already bored with Gears of War: Judgment? I'm only about 90 minutes into the campaign, but it has to rank as one of the most forgettable openings ever. Sure, it looks pretty (very pretty at points), handles well, and feels very Gears, but I felt like putting the controller down after every end of level score screen. The way Judgment feels broken up into small, bite-sized chunks may well be the reason I feel so apathetic towards it. In previous Gears titles I've always wanted to push on to see what would happen next. Currently all the Judgment campaign seems to be offering is an ever-increasing cache of stars.
Due to the nature of the beast I can't say much about The Last Of Us – come back to . this Wednesday if you want my full thoughts – but this week has seen me start and finish Naughty Dog's latest game.
If you're a regular to the site you may have noticed that my early impressions fell within the realm of being slightly worried about it, going as far as to say it may not be the experience I hoped it would. All I'll say is I was very, very wrong...
Without going into too much detail (the review embargo for this one isn't until next week, folks), I'm having a love/hate relationship with Remember Me. There are fleeting moments of something very special here, but they're always sandwiched between B-grade nonsense that detracts from the overall quality. It's frustrating, because Remember Me has the potential to be so incredibly good. The Memory Remix sequences, for example, as few as there seem to be, are fantastic, but they're let down by everything going on around them.
The dialogue is by far the biggest offender. There's an action sequence midway through that attempts to use Little Red Riding Hood as a metaphor for what's occurring on-screen – and it's spectacularly awkward, unnatural and, frankly, absolute garbage. In the end, Remember Me often comes across as something that thinks it's far more intelligent than it really is. But (and maybe I'm giving it the benefit of the doubt here) I can't work out whether that's down to something being lost in translation, or if it's simply just an outright shoddy script. Either way, I'd expect some pretty mixed scores for this one next week.
So toxic it's likely to turn you into a raging killing machine, this movie tie-in is among the worst games of the year. It may well be the worst. A zombie shooter where your enemies run at you in slow-motion like an undead YouTube recreation of Chariots of Fire, mixed with exploration elements that ask you to pick up books and tap computers. Not log on, not search for clues, just tap, like the monkeys at the monolith at the beginning of 2001. Did I mention that your movement is so sluggish and disjointed that you may well become to confused as to which side of the zombie war you're on?
Oh, and it has rubbish in-app purchases. Wonderful.
