The Week in Review: Wii U Component Pornography Edition

There's loads going on this week, but easily the most exciting moment was when Nintendo decided to peel back the outer shell of the Wii U to reveal its naked interior parts. I can't remember a time when a platform holder has offered such an insight into its new hardware before release. However, for Nintendo's sake let's hope size really doesn't matter because that CPU is absolutely tiny.

So tiny in fact that the Wii U can't even render New Super Mario Bros. U in 1080p, despite being able to do so 24 hours ago. Be advised that there is no evidence to suggest the size of the CPU is the reason NSMBU doesn't render in 1080p. Not that any of this matters to video games illusionist Michael Pachter who simply despises Wii U because it's too much like a DS. Pachter's opinion's won't stop the hype train, though, with the first Wii U TV ads to begin airing next week, including a 60 second ad during the X Factor – a story Dave told me he only wrote as an excuse to photoshop pictures of Tulisa and Cheryl Cole. Bad boy, dirty boy, in your bed!

Whilst Nintendo is gearing up to launch a new platform, Sony made a moderate amount of noise this week about its PS3 console reaching five million unit sales in the UK. So happy was the firm with this sales milestone that it sent media outlets a range of cakes – we received a batch of 12 Hummingbird Bakery Cupcakes and they were more delicious than you can possibly imagine. Sony also unveiled its new look PS3 Store, but sadly this announcement wasn't supported by a cake delivery. PS Vita also reached a new Japanese milestone of one million units sold, but that's hardly an achievement in what amounts to the best part of a year.

Sales figures continue to roll in - like that woman who eats blocks of cheese – including a huge debut for Borderlands 2 in the US and an equally impressive start for Resident Evil 6 in Japan. This week also saw the Mechromancer DLC arrive for Borderlands 2, with Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty campaign DLC set to release on October 16.

Elsewhere Riot Games decided it was time to let everyone know just how huge League of Legends has become, revealing that the MOBA is the most played game in the world – a stat which has nothing to do with Riot winning the ownership of saucy domain, leagueoflegendsporn.com.

This week's reviews were: Dishonored, XCOM Enemy Unknow, NiGHTS into dreams, Fable: The Journey, Pokemon Black and White Version 2, and The Walking Dead: Episode 4.

That's about it for another week. I just have time to point out a fantastic Halo 4 competition which could win you a great Xbox 360 console and a trip to Seattle. There's also this week's podcast and episode 3 of Disc Lickers, which you can check out below.

I'm off to find a YouPorn stream of someone taking the screws out of a super slim PS3 before spreading its parts out in full view.