Smash TV - Xbox Live Arcade review

Prepare to die. A lot. Smash TV is back on the air, and if you hope to claim this game show's cash and prizes, you’ll have to grind your way through exhausting, seemingly endless swarms of robots, monsters and bald men with clubs. And that’s just in the first room.

The game that once lit up arcades with gore and then-obscene levels of carnage can now be yours for just a handful of quarters, and it looks and plays almost exactly as it did back in 1990. We say “almost” because it no longer costs you anything to continue when you run out of lives every 30 seconds, and you can now hook up with another player over Xbox Live for a slightly more interesting co-op battle.

But Smash TV is only cooperative in the sense that you’re not killing each other. It’s still a race to see who can grab the most cash and other goodies as they pop randomly into the one-screen arenas. Of course, you’ll be kind of distracted from the money by the steady march of monsters that continually pour into the room from all sides. So if you want to emerge from this show a big winner instead of just a survivor, you'll have to keep moving, let loose a steady stream of fire in as many directions as possible (with heavy weapons, when they appear) and never, ever feel guilty about letting your teammate get swarmed while you snag the prizes.