Due to many different reasons that I won't get into at this juncture, I didn't play much this week other than more Mario Kart 8. If you'd like some preliminary thoughts about Nintendo's returning franchise, you need only click here.
So, with that said, I thought I'd use this week's VG Plays to tell you a story from a few years ago, brought back to the forefront of my memory after a short session on GTA 5.
With the sun set and the evening truly dominating the sky, I was driving back from Portsmouth after a relatively successful gig. As the sound of Metallica boomed from my car speakers, I turned onto a dark A-road, mere miles from my house.
Travelling at a reasonable 50mph, danger suddenly struck as, from nowhere, a deer vaulted out into the road. As I slammed my foot onto the brake in a desperate attempt to avoid any collision, the now endangered animal did what all deers seem to do in these situations, namely jump back and forth without actually getting out of the way.
As my options ran dry, I devastatingly careered into the creature, the impact sending it flying onto my windscreen and then back into the road. When my ride finally came to a halt, I noticed what can only be described as one of the most horrific scenes I've ever witnessed.
Such had been the devastation of the crash, the deer's hind legs had come away from its body. Even worse, in a state of panic, it was slowly dragging itself into the nearby woods. It was the equivalent of watching a terrifying horror movie from the last decade.
I did ring the RSPCA for advice and felt awful for a good few days.
More specifically the popular 'Alarm' mini-game which, after a couple of weeks away, I'm finding difficult to get back into.
This week's high score is 6:45, but with a little more practice I'm hoping to push it to 6:50. And who knows, by taking advantage of the incredible 'SNOOZE' cheat I may even reach the dizzying heights of 6:54.
No matter how functionally sound it may be, though, it isn't any fun, and while the soundtrack's serviceable, it isn't as alarmingly good as the polyphonic symphonies found in some of its earlier rivals. It might be a sleeper hit, but unless absolutely necessary I'd recommend sitting this one out.
Murdered: Soul Suspect has taken up a lot of my time this week, as first I played it, then I talked about it, and then I talked about it some more to respond to the teeming throng of dick-weasels that don't like the phrase "supernatural cigarettes".
Beyond that, I've been playing with the idea of hiring a helicopter to get Miller into Glastonbury. He hasn't missed a British Metallica gig in 10 years, and he's not going to miss this one either. If you own, or know someone who owns a helicopter leasing firm, then please get in touch.
I'm still trying to beat former VG writer Jamin's time on the very first track in Fusion. I've got to within 0.2 seconds, but just can't finish the course well enough to hold onto an early lead. I won't stop until I beat him, even though he'll probably top it again afterwards. If I do this for every track, I feel I could get at least three years out of the game.
I’ve hit the 50 hour mark in Dark Souls 2, reaching the Doors of Pharros. Doing guides for the game (which you can find here) means I can pretty much recount the locations from memory, but that doesn’t mean it’s a memorable experience.
I’ve got a lot of issues with the much-loved sequel, mainly that it takes ideas from its predecessor at every turn. This isn’t just combat mechanics - this is straight up enemy design and attack patterns.
You can read more about my issues with the game in a feature that’ll be going up over the weekend, but it’s safe to say, I’m disappointed.
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. Plays, 28th November, 2015
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