This week Chris Bratt inflicted the pain of Zoo Rampage on me, a game where the idea is far better than the gubbins that actually made it to Steam.
Hoping that the simple will become the addictive, Zoo Rampage asks you to pick an animal before running riot through said zoo. You smash walls, take out other species, kill people. All the standard things you'd expect should a bunch of predators escape from their enclosures.
And that's it. Each round lasts two minutes and by and large is really boring. Plus it costs around £6. Do not buy Zoo Rampage.
I call him Fassbender. My new Pilot-stomping English gentleman is just one of the reasons why Respawn should be commended for its approach to prolonging the life of its multiplayer shooter. There's no premium-priced marijuana camo here: just free modes, notable tweaks and new customisation options for cheapskates like me, and decent new maps for those willing to push the boat out on additional content.
It's better than it ever was on both a technical and creative level, and for a game like Titanfall - a spectacular shooter even at launch - that's something that shouldn't go by unnoticed.
The World Cup is nearly over, and all is wrong again. Well, nearly all: there's still the majesty of Score: World Goals to rely on. If you haven't played it, it's a free iOS game that tasks players with recreating famous goals by drawing the flight of the ball (in every element that makes up the move, be it pass, shot, etc). Simple in theory, addictive in practice, it's a near-perfect timewaster.