The mad nonsense of Star Wars Battlefronts Darth Vader

As you probably know by now, Star Wars Battlefront is one of the most authentic interpretations of George Lucas' space operas ever made. I know this because I said so here, in this review. From its stormtrooper outfits to its recreation of Hoth to the Endor map to the blaster noises to the DUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN of John Willams' famous score, it's all there in Battlefront. It's a game which has been tailor-made to make you feel 7 years old again, and judging by some of the comments and criticism online, it has succeeded.

So how, why, has DICE seemingly conspired to make the voice actor for Darth Vader sound less like the most terrifying force in the universe, and more like, in the words of friend of VideoGamer Andy Kelly, someone talking into a pint glass?

I've talked at length about how well Vader is implemented in Battlefront, how after years and years of seeing him go from darkly wry Space Death to whiny adolescent sand-hater, it's good to see him back where he belongs: snapping necks and airily waving his lightsaber about killing rebels with their own blaster fire, like a slightly less evil version of the Queen. There used to be a sense of dread to this character, whose presence would alter the mood of entire scenes just by his entering a room, like your dad only with a laser sword. Battlefront restored this in his physical form: black death against white snow.

And then he speaks.

Listening to it, it doesn't sound much like Darth Vader at all: it sounds like someone having a quick go on one of those Vader voice changers they bought for their kid because they secretly hate them. Shouty and rushed, it's straining against the effect – that effect – that is overlaid on top of it. It sounds like a man doing a James Earl Jones impression, and a poor one at that.

(As an aside, Jones wasn't the only Vader: over the years others have taken on the role, adapting it and playing around with it: as Tor.com points out Brock Peters' interpretation in the 90s radio adaptation of the films jars at first, but give it a few minutes and you can see what he's going for. And if you want to get a handle on just how well the character translates, literally, when voice actors go for the emotion rather than an impression, then the same site also led me to this excellent collection of Darth Vader dialogue dubbed into all manner of languages. Not sure about the Hebrew one, I must say, but still.)

This imitation of Jones' voice goes for the bass tone but – like many others – it's lacking the sadism, the cruel, clear, almost British diction of his words, a barely-suppressed anger which manifests in seething speech. Vader doesn't speak a lot, but when he does you can hear that dark mechanical heart through his words. There's an arrogance to Jones' voice, even when he's criticising others for their arrogance, which on the arrogance scale is slightly higher than Mr Perfect (so, massive) yet still somewhere below Hulk Hogan (so, still of this universe). It's intimidating and forceful and natural. Jones is an accomplished (and award-winning) stage actor, and it shows.

His voice can be replicated, to varying degrees, and it can be done well, even if there's still a tiny part of your brain which will still whisper 'that's not Darth Vader, and also, while I'm here, remember that stupid thing you did when you were in Year 8? Yeah, you do now' when you hear it. So it's bordering on ridiculous that this take on Vader is so poor, especially when you consider how much time and effort has been poured into making this one of the most authentic Star Wars games ever made, into the meticulous production design found elsewhere. Perhaps the most famous thing about Vader is his voice, after all: it has its own saga outside of the continuity of the films (or, as it's more colloquially known, 'real life').

Here, it's like Homer doing Mr Burns' voice at the post office, and hearing it just flips the 'fuck that shit' switch and yanks you right out of the experience. The spell is broken instantly. What's even more curious is that Battlefront's Vader appears to be voiced by Matt Sloan – he's listed in the credits, although not specifically as ol' Darth – who has played the role in a lot of other Star Wars games (and was particularly good in The Force Unleashed; he's one of the few voice actors even close to sounding like Jones).

It's a huge shame, but amazingly, Vader's not even the worst of the lot: that honour goes to Palpatine's voice, who sounds like a wizened old woman calling house at a particularly shit bingo: astonishing when you consider that DICE is unbelievably well-regarded for its audio design. Whether the weak voice acting in Battlefront is the fault of DICE or a team at Lucasfilm or Disney or whoever supplied it is up for debate, but it's still a glaring weak spot in an otherwise near-faultless replication of Star Wars' audio and visual motifs.