Need I remind you that I wear the win-pants around here?

I’m not going to pretend to know what happened. One minute I was sitting here, minding my own business, finishing up dozens of mind-shattering articles and videos, and the next I am out cold. Something rough and vaguely British struck me in the back of the head, and before I knew it, I was dreaming of crumpets and eccentric comedy skits. It was terrible.

But that’s not the important part. What’s important is that, via a series of incredibly illegal acts, I was able to extricate myself from captivity, remove most of the neural implants, and get back into the T3 control room.

What does that mean for you? Most assuredly, it means more everything. More articles, more videos, more fascist moderation of comments – all the stuff you love about Top Tier Tactics! We’re even bringing on an additional writer to bolster the innumerably huge pile of content that already exists. It’s like I’ve secretly contracted some manner of terminal illness and am using this blog as a last-ditch effort at internet notoriety! Which is definitely not cough the case!

In addition to all this fun stuff, I happen to have a large amount of free time for the next two weeks, during which I’ll hopefully complete the following tasks:

• The next iteration of my Team Fortress 2 Replay Guide
• New HD strategy for Magic the Gathering: Duels of the Planeswalkers 2012
• Never-before seen levels of passive-aggressive manipulation
• An overview of some Android games you can’t afford to not buy
• A more formal introduction and first article from our newest staff member
• And an exclusive look at an as-of-yet unannounced Assassin’s Creed title!

Why two weeks? Is it any of your business? Of course not! But I assure you it has absolutely nothing to do with the hypothetical illness mentioned above.I don’t prefer to be cryptic,* so I promise I’ll reveal more information as each new update comes to pass. All you need to do is sit back, wait for more of your favorite Top Tier Tactics stuff, and uh… I don’t know, leave lots of awesome comments?

That said, I would like to extend my thanks to Binerexis and Xiant for holding the fort for the previous two weeks, even if it meant I had to deal with a few lingering Borg implants. The worst part? Nobody told me ahead of time the Borg were particularly fond of silicone.

PS: Radiant Silvergun, also known as the greatest shmup of all time, also known as “that Saturn game that used to cost $200 and up,” has been released on Xbox Live Arcade. If you haven’t already bought it, what’s your excuse? If it’s “I don’t own an Xbox 360” I should remind you that a used Xbox and this downloadable title still add up to less than this game used to cost by itself. Think about that for a minute.

* I am apparently highly capable of boldfaced lies.